Just 48 hours after organ donation surgery, a gentleman sits in a Star Wars themed home office belonging to his husband. Surrounded by light sabers decorating the walls, themed rugs and R2D2 figurines, Joseph Lewis – originally from Syracuse New York – is a quintessential altruist we’re proud to call one of Our People. During this interview an ‘on the mend’ Lewis spoke candidly about his life, his work and what it’s been like living and working in Charlotte with a call to serve others through compassion and equity.
L’Monique King: How long have you lived in Charlotte?
Joseph Lewis: I moved here from Syracuse in 2011.
LMK: Knowing you’re not feeling the greatest at the moment, we thank you again for your time. Would you mind sharing a bit about why you’re not feeling so well today?
JL: I’m recovering from a kidney donation to someone I don’t know. It was originally supposed to go to someone in Minneapolis but was diverted during the surgery to a woman in New York. Many moons ago I also opted to try to become a bone marrow donor. I haven’t had the opportunity to donate marrow yet, but I may be called to give bone marrow at some part in my life.
LMK: What made you want to donate your kidney?
JL: When you start the process of donation your eyes are opened to the huge demand. For every person donating a kidney there are seven or eight waiting. American health habits have really contributed to the demand; obesity, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, things that put stress on kidney function.
LMK: Let’s talk a little about that special someone helping you on your journey to recovery. How long have you been married?
JL: When it became legal federally, we got married two weeks later. It was a courthouse wedding – the following summer we had a more celebratory wedding in New York. It was at the zoo, with live animals walking around during cocktail hour. We rented out the zoo so attendees could freely walk around without public interference. It was very private. We’re big animal lovers. We have 3 Chihuahuas of our own and we also foster them so they can be rehabilitated [to] forever homes.
LMK: What do you love most about your husband?
JL: He’s like a child, in a good way. He’s fun, keeps my seriousness in check and has a kid at heart mentality. He keeps our life more interesting and spontaneous. Me, I’d probably just stay home and work, but he doesn’t allow me to do that. It’s a well-balanced relationship.
LMK: Speaking of relationships, what’s your connection to Stonewall Sports Charlotte?
JL: I currently sit on the Board of Directions, serving as DEI (Diversity, Equity and Inclusion) Director. I like being the Director there and I also play some of the sports – like dodgeball. We’re a fun team and always bring people together in the end whether we win or lose.
My role is to look at policies to make sure they are as inclusive as possible. I look at how we market – making sure we reach diverse communities. For a very long time our demographics (those who play in our sports) looked very white, very male. But the community we serve is not. So, one of the first things I did was to get more involved with organizations like Charlotte Black Pride and other diverse organizations in Charlotte.
LMK: Have you been involved in any other volunteer activities?
JL: Previously (2015-2021) I was the treasure at Time Out Youth. Having served in these positions “if there’s ever something I can do for others, if I ever have the opportunity to change someone’s life I’ll do it. I’m in pain right now [from the kidney donation surgery] and will be for a couple of weeks, [but] because this can literally save someone’s life, [i]t’s worth it.
LMK: How do you make your livelihood?
JL: I work for Guardian Life, a life insurance company that also sells group benefits. A lot of people know us for our dental insurance. There I’m on the Equity and Inclusion team as a Strategy Optimization and Insights Director. My role is to help the organization identify systems and processes that might not be inclusive and find solutions to making the organization as equitable as possible for everyone.
LMK: On a lighter note, if you watch television, what are your top three programs?
JL: I watch a lot of home improvement and Sci-Fi shows. I also like Young Sheldon.
LMK: Out to eat or at home, chicken or fish?
JL: Neither, I’m vegan.
LMK: Favorite Vegan haunt?
JL: Mama Wok, it’s in the Ballantyne area. It’s a full Chinese vegan restaurant. They make great hot and sour soup, it’s absolutely amazing. And the sweet and sour chicken (made with tofu) is also really good.
LMK: Ok, it’s expose’ time. Enlighten our readers on something people would be surprised to know about you?
JL: <Long thoughtful pause> I think for me, it would be that I’ve delt with trauma in my life and use that trauma to help others. I lost a (40-year-old) brother to suicide and leveraged that [painful experience] to be able to support others. It was really rough on me and my family. I also lost my dad to a heart attack at 43 and had a niece die of cancer at only six-years-old. I had to find a way to deal with it [all], not hide it.
Mental health is often not treated as [physical] health but must be attended to. You can let trauma control you (it did for a while) or you can get help, maybe find a therapist and get support – so you can help others avoid those situations [of allowing trauma to take over].
The fun thing people don’t know [about me], is that I can fix cars, literally take one apart and put it back together. My brothers built and raced race cars. As a gay person, people don’t think of the LGBTQ community as mechanics.
LMK: What do you see yourself doing 20 years from now?
JL: Retired from my normal job but volunteering in the community. I don’t see myself sitting still and having a drink on the beach. I’d like to think LGBTQ issues will no longer be a problem [by then] but in all honesty it’ll probably get worse before it gets better – so I still see myself working within the arena of DEI of some sort and specifically in the LGBTQ lane.
LMK: Care to elaborate on your thoughts on our current political state?
JL: Divisive. We’re heading in the wrong direction right now. People are too apt to hear what they want to hear instead of what will help everyone. There’s so much that needs to be done to fix the inequities. In the current climate people aren’t willing to talk or build bridges.
LMK: Any closing thoughts for our readers?
JL: Get involved. If you’re not involved, you’re just playing sideline quarterback.