Dear Trinity,
A month ago, I became friends with my ex’s new boyfriend. It was just coincidental. But my ex has gotten really stirred up and is trying to destroy the friendship. His boyfriend still wants to be friends, but I’m stuck in World War Three. Help?
Stuck, Albany, NY
Dear Stuck,
“Just coincidental,” come on, who wants an ex boyfriend becoming friends with a new boyfriend? Maybe Satan? Honey, it’s time to spend “your time” dating and meeting new men, not being involved in your ex’s new relationship. It’s called boundaries. Just put your friendship on hold for a bit, that’s all, and leave them alone for a while. (And that’s a period at the end of that sentence!)
Hello Trinity,
What do I have to do to get someone to go out with me? I have a good job, my own home, and I’m very nice. What more should someone want?
Is There More, St. Louis, MO
Hello Is There More,
Sorry, but 200 years ago you could have a job, be nice and find a mate; today you need a little something called sex appeal. So, check your hair, teeth, clothes, breath, body odor and body to see if they’re appealing enough for someone special to want to yank you out of bachelorhood. Pumpkin, if animals, plants and Paris Hilton need to use sex appeal… so do you! (Check out my cartoon to see how “refined” a gentleman has to be to capture my attention!)
Dearest Trinity,
My boyfriend just broke up with me. Is there anything I can do to get him back?
Return To Sender, Omaha, NE
Dearest Return To Sender,
I wish men weren’t such stubborn creatures, but they are. You could try to spend time as friends, get him to talk about your relationship problems and see if you both can work it out. With time, sweetie, he may or may not come back, and you may or may not want him back. Yet, if you did something bad, try Plan B: flowers, apology letter and a fancy dinner. Give it time, yet don’t waste time!
Hey Trinity,
My other half wants to try an open relationship. I’m confused. Is there anything good that can come out of such an agreement?
Trying To Be Open, San Jose, CA
Hey Trying,
Since open relationships are about agreements, you can agree or disagree on any part of it. Some open relationship couples don’t talk about it, some only have threeways, some do it a lot, some hardly do it at all, yet most just want the option. Still confused, baby? Then try reading:
Trinity’s Positive Arguments For Starting An Open Relationship
1. The Frequency: You don’t have to do it every week. You can agree on it just once or just once a year.
2. The Discussion: You don’t have to talk about it every time you do it, if you agree not to.
3. The Cheating: You‘ll never get caught cheating or being cheated on because of your new agreement.
4. The Guilt: You never have to feel (that) guilty about it because you agreed it’s now OK.
5. The Togetherness: You can agree to practice it strictly with your partner or separately.
6. The Threeways or Threesomes: You can agree to invite a third person home for one night (threeway) or for one whole year (threesome).
7. The Smarter Sex: Once you’ve agreed to be open, you’re both more likely to practice safer sex because the situation feels less criminal.
8. The Stimulation: If your relationship isn’t very sexual or adventurous, this agreement may put the flame back into everything.
9. The Off Button: It’s not a jail sentence. You can agree to try it or end it at any time.
10. Lastly, The Respect: You no longer have to sneak around. You can respect each other, your trysts and your agreements.
info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.