Dear Trinity,
I’m a 30-year-old escort having the time of my life. However, after hundreds of clients, I recently experienced my first rejection. It’s awful! I could have just died. I’m trained in many things, but not that. What’s an escort to do?
Baby Boomer for Hire, Boston, MA

Dear Baby,
Some enlightened souls become escorts for money, adventure or survival, but many escorts quickly find out that escorting is really an experiment in rejection and self-acceptance. If one act of rejection is throwing you into a frantic search for your pacifier, then take this as a big sign that you need to learn the truth about rejection, acceptance and your own self-esteem. Beauty (or ugly) is in the eye of the beholder. People simply have “types” and that has nothing to do with you even when it does. It’s all about the guy buying the art and nothing to do with the art itself. So, pumpkin, start seeing rejection as your enlightened lesson toward higher self-acceptance!

Dearest Trinity,
I go on many dates and often meet great guys, but I can’t seem to keep a boyfriend. Should I stop trying and become a monk?
Manhunter or Monk, Kansas City, MO

Dearest M. or M.,
Remember, men are boys in grownup bodies. Most would rather play with their remote controls then deal with relationships. Keep hunting and beware of what you’re catching and how you are going about it. Life, my darling, is a daring adventure or it is nothing, so never stop trying. (Check out how I resolve this dilemma while gazing at my cartoon.)

Hello Trinity,
I took your advice about powerdating (dating many guys at once). But, when is it time to date just one guy?
The More The Merrier, St. Louis, MO

Hello Merry,
Dating more than one guy while powerdating is smart. I always say, don’t put all your “Leggs” in one basket.” It may leave you nothing or no one to fall back on! But, eventually you must take that leap into one man’s arms with full extension, I mean attention! The time to say, “I do” or “It’s just you” will arrive when you know it, not sooner or later and not at any specific time. And, honey, don’t forget to enjoy the ride! Good luck.

Hey Trinity,
I’ve always thought of you as an upbeat, New Age gal. I could use some help on staying happy and on top of life.
Not So Upbeat, Dallas, TX

Hey Not So Upbeat,
In the summer of 1987, the Harmonic Convergence came to light and so did I. Dr. Bernie Seagle, Louise Hays and Leo Buscaglia all agree that to stay happy and on top of life, we must keep reaffirming our positive thoughts. That’s why, sweetie, I do morning affirmations like these:

Trinity’s First Ten Morning Affirmations
1. I may be overworked and a bit out of shape, but damn it girl, you’ve got purchasing power!
2. Honey, you’re not in jail, in the hospital or in the gutter, so be proud!
3. So, I’m pushing 50 and single, but I’ve never been wife beaten or made to do laundry!
4. I put you through two masters degrees, a singing and writing carrier, vacations all over the world. Now…tell me you love me!
5. I may not be as famous as Rupal, but she doesn’t have a syndicated cartoon character of herself!
6. You may not be as rich as Dame Edna, but you’ve got class and charm down to a science!
7. I know every man you meet is on anti-depressants, but at least they’re attractive!
8. The rent’s paid, the car works and you still turn heads on Saturday night, so stop complaining!
9. Forget about the wrinkles and love handles! God made plastic surgeons and insurance claims for a reason!
10. You are gorgeous, talented, healthy and one hell of a lover. So, chin up and off to work you go!

— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking” a weekly radio drama performed globally and is now minister of WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings.

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