My new girlfriend has a four-year-old daughter that she conceived by sleeping with a man just to get pregnant. She has never told the father or the daughter about each other. I feel strongly that they both have a right to know. My girlfriend disagrees and never intends to tell either one of them. What do you think and should I tell him?
Losing Respect, Wichita, KS
Hello Losing Respect,
Remember, if you spill the beans, you may also have to eat them. My vote is absolutely no! Do not squeal on anyone unless someone’s life is in danger and no one’s life is in danger! If you can’t be girlfriends with her because this bothers you so much, then say goodbye. But my bet is that eventually she is going to want to come clean when she is ready. For now, be a respecting and supportive girlfriend by letting her be the queen of her own destiny rather than you being a Control Queen
I’m about to move out of my own house and in with my lover of three years, but I cannot commit to being monogamous. Sex is not a big part of our relationship, but companionship is. What do you think about monogamy?
Monogamy Or Your Life, Portland, ME
Many couples have trouble with mo…mo…mo…nogamy. Living and loving someone special is a give and take and mo…, mo…mo…nogamy is hard for every animal, I mean man. This may be one of the issues you both have to agree on — or agree to disagree on. (Personally, you can see from my cartoon that the whole discussion makes me swoon!)
I started dating someone in my office. My coworkers think that it will cause problems. I agree with them. but I really like this person. Help!
Internal Affairs, Charleston, SC
Dearest Internal Affairs,
Good relationships always have two major ingredients, time together and time apart. This may give you a new light on “time apart.” You may be one of the few lucky ones who gets to spend almost every waking hour with your new hate, I mean date. And, if that doesn’t scare you, then do the math, eight working hours together plus four to six socializing hours together. Well that leaves you just enough time to runaway to a new job, in another part of the world.
Getting my boyfriend away from his work is a big problem in our relationship. How do I get him to see that he is a workaholic?
Work Or Me, Dayton, OH
Hey Work Or Me,
There are many reasons for working too much but there are many more reasons to not work so much, i.e., life, love, adventure, health and so on. More often than not, most people don’t even know they’re workaholics until they see…
Trinity’s Eye Opening Tips For Knowing If You’re A Workaholic
1. A microwave, espresso machine and takeout menus are what you proudly call your kitchen!
2. Anyone who can’t do two or three things at once you call, “a slacker!”
3. Thinking about Mondays brings you tears of joy.
4. Someone finally asks you to marry them, but you only have time to answer them by email.
5. You love watching the sunrise from your office window.
6. Vacation means: swimsuits, cocktails, tropical breezes, cell phone, laptop and a Blackberry.
7. Attending weddings and funerals seem ridiculous when you can be making money.
8. If you can’t correspond with Post-It Notes, then you’re not interested in corresponding.
9. Driving means shaving, applying make-up, talking on the cell phone with clients and getting dressed.
10. Lastly, it’s been years since you’ve done your own laundry, cooking, cleaning or driving and you can’t remember how! : :
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally.