Dearest Trinity,
Life just doesn’t have the kick it once had. I don’t even want to get out of bed to walk the dog. Any ideas for shaking off depression?
Thanks, Depressed, Baltimore, MD

Dearest Depressed,
All living creatures have days where they’re on top of the world and days when they’re in the gutter, and then soon enough have days again where they’re back on top of the world. That’s life. The one trick of staying longer on top than in the gutter is to STAY BUSY! When we’re busy we don’t have time for depression. This advice column which is now in its 19th year directly came out of needing to beat a winter depression. So, pumpkin, start small with a one-hour home project, then a half-day cooking or painting activity, then a weekend retreat. Also, eat dark chocolate, sleep, exercise and watch funny movies. Come join life’s party.
Love, Trinity

To Trinity,
I’m a handsome, fun, extroverted, 40 something, well-off gay man. I think I’m a catch, but I can’t seem to catch anyone.
Yours, Catch-less, San Antonio, TX

To Catch-less,
Many of us forget that dating like life is a constant dance between success and failure. Meeting men can be a lot harder then let’s say, catching a lobster in a trap, but the process is not much different. Could it be that you’re not setting enough traps or meeting enough lobsters or you stop trying once you get a bad lobster? Could it be that you’re too aggressive when trying to lure one in or is your trap outdated and it needs a makeover? In conclusion, darling, never give up, ask friends for help, and keep up with the fashions. Looking your best is your best way to trap a lobster, I mean a man. (See my cartoon on how my makover went.)
Love, Trinity

Dear Trinity,
I’m not happy with the person whom I’ve been dating for the past seven years. I’ve wanted out many times. My friends and family think I’m crazy. Do you think I’m crazy for giving up after seven years?
Yours, Crazy? New Hope, PA

Dearest Crazy?,
Friends and family always say, “stick it out,” and they may have a point. Yet still, you’re not crazy, however, you may have become lazy! What I mean is, look inside yourself and see if your relationship troubles have to do with you not asking for or even demanding as to what you need and want. On some level we create our life, the people in it and our situations so that we can learn more deeply about ourselves. Sweetie, counseling and/or separation are always better roads to take because they leave you alternatives. Otherwise start packing!
Good luck, Trinity

Hello Trinity,
I’m dating a married man. There, I finally said it. Help?
Yours, Dating A…, Eugene, OR

Hello Dating A…,
You must have missed last years “Ten Tips on Dating Someone Married,” so I’m going to reprint it. But remember, sweetie, this path is definitely the hardest one. So here’s,

Trinity’s Top Ten Tips For Dating Someone Married
1. Keep asking your higher power, “How the hell did you get me into this mess?”
2. Forget fantasizing about the future. There is none!
3. Don’t give presents that leave clues. Especially undergarments. Accepting presents is fine.
4. Guilt and shame are for religious fanatics. Forgiveness and self-respect are for enlightened realists.
5. Cologne and perfume are only worn when dating someone unmarried!
6. Two’s company but three can only bring cheaper rent. Hey! I think we’ve got something!
7. Adults have secrets! Honor their privacy and your own.
8. Be a classy hussy. If you must speak nasty about their spouse, don’t do it in front of them!
9. Have some smarts! Don’t sleep with anyone married until you see the divorce papers.
10. Lastly, jewelry, art and leather give great return value, especially the day after they say, “I can’t do this anymore.”

With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings,, Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! Learn more at Send emails to: