My sister gets on my case about my one-night stands. When I tell her it’s normal for men, she guilt-trips me. Should I feel guilty?
Yours, Guiltless Wilmington, DE
One-night stands are commonly thought of as naughty and unholy acts that take place late at night when two people are drunk and dancing with the devil. You and I both know that this isn’t true because we watched “Sex in the City” all those years. However, while it is adventurous and normal, it can also leave you empty and confused, which we also learned from “Sex in the City.” Honey, if your body is your temple and life is your spiritual path, then have guiltless one-night stands when it feels right, not when you need to prove you can score the hottest babe or dude! Well, maybe that’s not such a bad reason?
After five years together I was dumped for someone else, and I’m very angry. I want my ex to pay. How should I get revenge on someone for promising everything then leaving me a bachelor?
Yours, Lost In Bachelorhood Cheyenne, WY
Hey Lost In Bachelorhood,
I can respect your anger, but I would also, as quickly as possible, let them suffer in their loss… of you. The best revenge, Sweetie, is living your life even greater than it was before and leaving them to stew in envy of your new gorgeous freedom. Now that’s revenge!
DATING DILEMMA #573
I am so stressed out about dating. All that work getting ready, hoping they show up, saying the right thing, then that awkward moment when we have to kiss goodbye. I wish two people could just meet and marry!
Yours truly, Stressed New Hope, PA
Wow, you’re stressing me out too! Dating, like life, is stressful, challenging and very complicated, but that’s life and that’s also the growth, the experience and the journey of dating. So, Pumpkin, breathe, have a glass of wine and say yes to life, yes to dating… and yes to therapy!
My best friend says, “I don’t read his signals” when we are out at a bar. What the hell signals should I read?
Thanks, Signal Stumped Montgomery, AL
Hey Signal Stumped,
It’s almost impossible to know what to do in a dark, noisy and (in some states) smoky patio bar, unless Darling, you’ve studied:
Trinity’s Secret Codes For Friends At A Bar
Scenario: While hitting on someone, your friend appears and you want to say…)
1. (Is “this one” gorgeous or what?) You: “Is this place Oz or what?”
Friend: “Totally!” or “I like Kansas better!”’
2. (Get “this one” away from me!) You: “Did you get my VD results?”
Friend: “Yes, and I need to talk to you right now!”
3. (Get lost I’m cruising someone!) You: “How’s your mother?”
Friend: “Oh, I need to go call her right now!”
4. (Is “this one” trouble?) You: “Is Dorothy caught in the storm?”
Friend: “No, she’s fine.” or “Yes, and Toto too.”
5. (Can you leave us alone?) You: “Did you find your keys?”
Friend: “I’m still looking (as he/she/they walk away)!”
6. (Am I acting drunk?) You: “How’s Glinda’s bubble?”
Friend: “Fine.” Or, “It’s about to explode!”
7. (I need some money.) You: “Did the Dow drop twenty points today!”
Friend: “Oh, here’s the twenty I owe you!”
8. (Did you put your mark on “this one”?) You: “Is the water undrinkable?”
Friend: “No, it’s fine!” or “Yes, and you’ll be melting any minute!”
9. (Should I take “this one” home?) You: “Is it safe for Dorothy to leave Oz?”
Friend: “No, not tonight!” or “Yes, if she’s smart!”
10. (Are you ready to go?) You: “Is Dorothy ready to click her heels?”
Friend: “Yes!” or “No, she’s still looking for the Wizard!”
With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking” a weekly radio drama, performed globally and is now minister of WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings. Sponsored by: WIG Ministries, www.wigministries.org Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! Send e-mails to: Trinity@telltrinity.com